#44 How To Bounce Back From Business Disappointment

September 11, 2023

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Experiencing disappointment in business is inevitable, but how long it lasts, and how much it takes you off track is completely up to you. 

Maybe it’s a launch that fell short of your revenue targets…

A business coach you hired that didn’t make the difference you hoped…

A team member that you rely on quits…

Or a client requests a refund.

Events like this can leave you feeling disappointed.

One of two things usually follows from feeling disappointment in your business, particularly if you aren’t in the practice of managing your emotions, processing your feelings, or looking into your thoughts that caused them:

The first is that you want to create or start a new strategy, action, or activity instead of assessing and gathering insights into the situation that caused your disappointment.

You create a new focus so you can avoid feeling disappointed.

This is an example of all-or-nothing thinking, which is usually rushed, all-consuming, and designed to rid ourselves of the negative emotions we’re experiencing around the situation. 

We try to control an external variable to manage our own emotions.

But beware that trying to outrun your disappointment will more than likely compound the feeling.

That’s because whatever you focus on next will be fuelled by the thoughts driving your disappointment, which will inevitably lead to creating disappointing results because your motivation is to escape something negative, so as you create or contribute to something new still carrying negativity, it’s hard to create positive outcomes.

And when you’re in a rush to replace one result with another, you’re likely to get the same result, but too often, the experience can be even worse.

Or maybe you try the alternative and all too common path after a business disappointment… Where you avoid trying that strategy, making that offer or doing that thing EVER AGAIN.

And let’s be clear: that kind of avoidance can delay your potential success by years or even lead to you quitting your business altogether.

So why does it happen?

Because our business goals are often created from desire rather than data. 

Desire can appear VERY real and attainable, and it creates real stories around why those decisions are our saving grace, game-changing move, or huge windfall.

And we go all in chasing the fulfilment of that desire.

The stakes get higher…

And the disappointment if we miss the mark becomes bigger.

Especially the more times you try.

But it’s funny that for those business goals and decisions that matter so much to us, the expectations we have for making them happen are rarely based on research, data, and facts…

They’re too often being fueled by an emotional connection to move towards the triumph of success, the windfall of more money or the avoidance of energy or effort drain… or heaven forbid,  having to wait longer than we want (or think we should).

In our rush to reach the summit of our desires, we often skip over the capacity to accept that there is a corresponding amount of HARD that sits parallel to the EASE we anticipate when we’ll reach our big business goals.

Or we just underestimate our own abilities or knowledge of what’s really required because we haven’t done it before.

It’s like parenting… You have no clue what the reality of it will be, yet you go in thinking you can nail it based on an underestimation of what’s required because of your lack of experience.

And making it worse is that rather than investigate what is really going on, we make it mean we’re wrong or we’re not enough, and it’s like a pile-on that amplifies the disappointment, making it difficult to shake off and move on from.

Even though disappointment can result from your perceived failures or missed expectations, it’s also driven by our beliefs about external factors.

It’s not the team member who quits after you invested all that time training them and paying them higher than you anticipated who caused your disappointment…

It’s not the coach you hired to help you lose weight that made you put on weight instead of squeezing back into your pre-baby jeans.

It’s ignoring that your thinking influences how you feel, which in turn drives what you will and won’t do to make your big business goals happen.

And the way you think about anything is up to you.

It’s not the launch you spent $25K on to make $32K; it’s thinking that you should have made $100K – that’s the cause of the disappointment – the missed $68K you arbitrarily decided you deserve.

Instead, look at the $32K as a data point and then look for reasons why that number happened. 

Look at what was missed, what was needed, what did work well, and what you can do to maximize the opportunities rather than abandon the possibilities so you can stop holding on to disappointment and blaming yourself and others.

I’m not saying just to feel positive instead.

I know it’s not that easy, but what I am saying is that excavating for insights and planning for evidence-based solutions to help you reach your goals in business will serve you far better than being railroaded by negative emotions.

So, how can you start to shift how you prepare for and experience business disappointment?

 3 Keys To Cure (Or Prevent) Business Disappointment:

  1. Expectation Reality Check – data-driven/evidence, exploration of priorities, capability assessments (your own, resources, and critical success factors), external influences, and liking your reasons – no matter what.
  2. Checking Your Attachment, Emotions & Resistance To Your Goals – red flags include rushing, frustration, immaturity, impulsive investments, scarcity and unreasonable demands, and STRESS and overwhelm.
  3. Swift Emotional Processing To Move On – Of course, disappointments will sometimes happen, but eventually, when you are able to process and assess rather than blame yourself. Having your own coach to get curious about your perception of the circumstances that lead to your disappointment or just getting your stream of consciousness down will help to see this more clearly, too.

If you are experiencing disappointment in your business, or you’re feeling a little hopeless, resistant, or stuck, then another thing you may need is to shine a light on the unseen opportunities that exist for you RIGHT NOW. And how to harness them in alignment with measurable and strategic goals rather than wishes and dreams or arbitrary expectations.

Want to have a quick reality check? Book in for your business growth call with me. It’s absolutely free and fun and will help prevent rather than cure disappointment. Head here to claim your session https://www.victoriagibson.com/apply

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